Bah-Humbug

This is likely going to be a negetive post, so if you don't want to hear my negetivity, just stop reading now.

 

I am not in the Christmas spirit. At all. This is not me. I usually love it. I think I am stressed and a little depressed this time around. Why? There are so many factors going on here, it's not even funny.

 

Christmas is 10 days away and I have not yet bought a single gift. I go to a store, then walk around aimlessly and walk out the door with nothing. My Christmas spirit is gone. I think I have begun to loathe the fact that Christmas is about gifts. There's nothing I want for Christmas. There are a few things I need, but all are over $100 and it's just rediculous of me to expect someon to get me anything over $100. If you asked me what my favorite Christmas gift of all time was, I could not give you an answer. My Christmas memories are not of gifts, but of good times with my family. Memories of finding a surprise in my shoes on St. Nick Day (and the excitement had absolutely nothing to do with what was actually left in my shoes). Memories of hearing bells outside and a jolly old man coming to the door (later I learned it was the neighbor guy from across the street). Watching my Mother prepare the Christmas feast and having all my aunts and uncles and cousins come over to eat the glorious feast. Memories of my Uncle John reading the Night Before Christmas while the adults sip their cocktails and the kids sit on the floor in front of him. THAT is what Christmas is to me.

 

This year I have been told what to do. Here are some examples.

• "Tell me what you want for Christmas." Money to pay the bills. Next.
• "What does Jesse want for Christmas?" Um, he can't even talk. He'd probably be happy with a bottle of Ranch dressing.
• "You are assigned to make peanut butter cookies for Christmas because last year there were duplicates." Are you freaking serious? I have been assigned a cookie? And peanut butter cookies? Those aren't even a Christmas cookie. I have an arsenal of Christmas cookies and you "assign" me peanut butter cookies? WTF?
• "We are starting the festivities at 1pm." Awesome, that's right at nap time. Didn't we learn our lesson at Thanksgiving?
• "Just get my kids a gift card." Ok, great idea, so this holiday is about gifts, but I am not even giving them a gift to open? Perfect. This is essentually just giving money away. How fun.

I suppose I could go on, but what's the point. This paints a picture already, does it not?

There are so many things I want to do. But I just don't have the motivation to do anything and no money to even do it. My goal here is to get all this off my chest and get going on some things, even if it's just cutting snowflakes out of copy paper.