Monday, November 19, 2012

Thankful & Emotional

I'm emotional today. Not sure if it's hormones or lack of sleep. Last night Jesse woke up several times. I know I should ignore him so he doesn't think that every time he makes a peep, I will come rushing in. I went into his room a few times last night. Honestly, I just wanted him to stop so I could sleep. I knew nothing was terribly wrong, because he was just whining and moaning, literally. I don't know what the cause is. Maybe overstimulation or overtired. If I go in to check on him, he's barely even awake. Sometimes his eyes aren't even open.

This time, I rough night turned into a rough morning. I got up, a few minutes later from my normal time. I got showered and dressed like always and went in to wake Jesse up. He was not having it. He said, "Still dark out," which is what I tell him when he wakes in the middle of the night and I want him to go back to sleep. Turning my tricks back around on me. He clearly wants to go back to sleep, so did I. Paul heard the commotion and came in. Paul doesn't mess around. He entered the fight knowing it would be a fight all the way to the car, which it was. A fight to put clothes on, to put shoes and socks on, to put a coat on and to get in the car. Once we were in the car and headed to daycare, I saw something.... me. I was staring back at my childhood self back there who couldn't catch his breath because he had gotten so worked up. I remember doing this to myself too. Maybe not at his young age, but I do in fact remember this. Is being strong-willed genetic? Or am I raising my son (who happens to be like me) in the same way my mother raised me, and in turn, getting the same results? Oh yes, I could be reading into this way too much. It happens, especially when I am emotional.

Money has been weighing heavily on my mind too. But I don't want to bore anyone with my money problems. Seems like everyone has money issues to some extent now days.

Paul and I got iPhones. It's totally changed how I utilize the internet. Plus I have a new found love for phone cameras. I can't afford the DSLR I want, so I might as well take advantage of the cool iPhone camera. You may say, "Wait a minute, if you are having money problems, why and how did you get an iPhone?" I have asked this in my head about others who have iPhones yet claim to be broke. Well, we were due for phone upgrades and much to my surprise, they were FREE! I didn't even think that was possible. Plus, with our carriers new Talk, Text and Data packages, we were able to get a data plan that fit in our budget. I think Instagram is my new favorite thing.

The only problem is that Jesse wants to play with my phone every time I have it out. That puts a slight damper on taking photos of him. I have to be sneaky.

Thanksgiving is this week. Short office week (with regular week pay, yay!)
People have been posting on facebook a daily thing they are thankful for. I am thankful for a lot, but I don't feel the need to make a daily post about it. I have a generic one, that covers a lot of bases. I am thankful for where we are due to the obstacles we've had to overcome. It's been a rough couple of years, this one being the hardest financially. But we are still here. Still have a roof over our heads, cars, electricity, heat and food.

We are going to my aunt's for dinner to spend the holiday with my Dad's family. Last year we did the holiday with Paul's family and we alternate. This one will be different. My parents are moving to Alabama in February. Sure they say they will be back for the holidays, but who knows if they will have the money to do that year after year. This one could possibly be the last one where we are all together. So that's another thing I am thankful for, my parents being here to spend this holiday with.

Happy Turkey Day!

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