Thursday, January 26, 2012

Just when you think things can't get worse...

They do! Maybe I am naive for thinking things couldn't get worse. Or maybe I have not hit rock bottom yet? Or maybe I am being tested once again to make sure I appreciate money when we finally do get a settlement for Paul's back injury? I don't know. What I do know is another curve ball got sent my way.

Monday morning I came into the office like any other Monday morning. My boss tells me we are having a team meeting at 10:30, like we do every other Monday morning. We sit down and make to do lists for the week and talk about business. We did that, then my boss says, now just listen.... uh oh. Uh oh is right. He proceeds to tell me that the company can no longer afford to employ me full time, that he's switching me to part time, 3 days a week! There was some other stuff, but honestly I don't think I even heard it because I was so distraught. I recall him saying something like, "Paul's working now, right?" I think I said something like, "yes, but not full time, he's making less money than he was getting work comp checks." Then I ask, when this is effective, he says next week. Wait, what?!?! You are cuttuing my pay by 40% and you give me a weeks notice??? I ask, "Can you at least give me two weeks?" He complies, but that's still not even enough time. I have to figure out how I am going to support my family in less than 2 weeks. Thanks boss! 10 years with you and you give me 2 weeks notice for a drastic pay cut. Perfect. I heard things like "I'll help you" or something, but the help I need is FULL TIME HOURS. I ask if I can step out, he says yes. I am not even sure the discussion was over, but I heard enough.

I b-line to my car and call my husband, no answer. I call again and he answers, I am so hysterical that I can't even talk. I think I cried the rest of the day. Thank goodness Paul had a xanax and muscle relaxer to give me when I got home because I was a mess, he even picked Jesse up from daycare for me. I don't think I have ever been so devistated in my life. Not soley because of my job, but because of all the other events in my life leading up to this. This was the LAST thing I needed. Of course I want to spend more time with my son, but at this cost? No thanks. I would have much preferred to do that on my own terms, when I am more financially stable, that's for sure.

So since the moment I stepped back into my office, I have been networking like crazy, loooking for part time or full time work. I have sent out handfulls of resumes already, I am not dropping the ball on this one, I can't. I need to be able to pay my mortgage next month! Not just the mortgage (which my new salary barely covers), but also my car payment, utilities, oh yeah, and food.

I'll do what I have to do, even if it means cleaning toilets for dirty, nasty truckers.

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