Well, I did pretty well for my first week back at work. My boss helped by having a beautiful bouquet of flowers here when I arrived. He also took me out to lunch on Monday. I probably needed the break from Jesse and Paul. Yesterday I started feeling like I was missing out on things at home, but I am thankful Jesse is home with his Dad and not at daycare. So I am a little jealous of Paul in that sense. This week I did some research and sent out some emails and got connected with some other mothers of children with clefts. It's nice to know I am not alone. Not just being a mother of a child with a cleft, but I am not alone in my thoughts and feelings. By exchanging emails and seeing their pages I realized I didn't need to hide this, so I posted his picture on babycenter and facebook. I am not sure why I was hiding it, but I was. He's beautiful and there's no reason why I can't share that.
We are going on a canoe trip tomorrow, then camping overnight. We are leaving Jesse with the MIL. I am thankful we have her to watch him, but she's not my favorite person in the world. I am a little nervous about the whole thing. Plus, I feel like I have hardly seen him all week, now I am giving him away overnight? Paul says I need this. I think it's him that needs it, or us as a couple. I must be crazy for agreeing to this. I suppose if I am miserable, we don't have to spend the night. I hope I can just let loose and have some fun. Even though it's been an emotional week for me.
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